Abby Stein
Abby Stein is an American transgender author, activist, blogger, model, speaker, and rabbi. She is the first openly transgender woman raised in a Hasidic community, and is a direct descendant of Hasidic Judaism's founder the Baal Shem Tov. In 2015, she founded the first support group nationwide for trans people of Orthodox background.
Stein is also the first woman, and the first openly transgender woman, to have been ordained by an Orthodox institution, having received her rabbinical degree in 2011, before coming out as transgender. While she has not worked as a rabbi after leaving till at least 2016, by 2020 she had re-embraced her title as rabbi, and is working in many capacities as a rabbi. In 2018, she co-founded Sacred Space, a multifaith project "which celebrates women and nonbinary people of all faith traditions."
Early life
Stein was born in 1991 in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, in New York City. She is the 6th child in a family of 13 born to a family of notable Hasidic leaders. She has five elder sisters. Her family is of Polish, Ukrainian/Romanian, Serbian, and Israeli descent, with modern Ukraine being the predominant origin. She grew up speaking Yiddish and Hebrew and was educated at a traditional all boys Jewish Day School. The community in which she grew up was highly segregated by gender, which impacts almost all aspects of daily life. She attended the Viznitz Yeshiva in Kiamesha Lake, Upstate New York for her high school education, also receiving ordination as a rabbi there in 2011. In 2012 she left the Hasidic community, and in 2014 she started school at Columbia University's School of General Studies.Coming out
In November 2015 Stein made headlines when she came out on her blog as transgender, and started physical transition. She was featured in some major media outlets, including The New York Times, New York Post, New York Magazine, NBC, Daily Dot, and more. She also appeared on TV, on CNN, Fox News, HuffPost Live, and Vice Canada.She also appeared on several international TV networks, and in numerous international newspapers and magazine in over 20 different languages.
When Stein left her community in 2012 and came out as an atheist, her parents said that "No matter what happens, no matter how you are, you are still my child." However, when she came out as trans, her father told her that "You should know that this means I might not be able to talk to you ever again." Since then her parents shunned her, and stopped talking with her altogether. She has also received some hate from her former community, though in an interview with Chasing News she said that she got less hate than some people would have expected.
Stein was featured in the 2016 Showtime Documentary series, Dark Net, in episode 8, "Revolt".
Naming Celebration/[Bat Mitzvah]
On June 4, 2016, Stein celebrated her transition and announced her name change to Abby Chava Stein at Romemu, a Jewish Renewal synagogue in the Upper West Side neighborhood of New York City. In an interview with The Huffington Post, she said that even though she did not believe in God, she wanted to celebrate in a synagogue:Publications
Stein's first book, "Becoming Eve: My Journey from Ultra Orthodox Rabbi to Transgender Woman", a memoir, was published by Seal Press on November 12, 2019..Stein was profiled in, and wrote the Foreword for Peter Bussian's book of portraits "Trans New York: Photos and Stories of Transgender New Yorkers." In the foreword she described her love for New York City both while in the Hasidic community, and now living as a Queer person in NYC. Published by Apollo Publishers,.
Essays
Her writings have also been published in "Queer Disbelief: Why LGBTQ Equality is an Atheist Issue," written by Camille Beredjick, edited by Hemant Mehta, and published by Friendly Atheist. Stein wrote an essay specifically for the book, titled "Trans Woman : Atheists Should Support the LGBTQ Movement.".Stein's essay about Covid-19 and it's impact on the LGBTQ community, titled "COVID has exploded Jewish LGBTQ acceptance online. There’s no going back." was included in "When We Turned Within: Reflections on COVID-19" an anthology of 165 essays edited by Sarah Tuttle-Singer and Menachem Creditor..
Stein also contributed to Jewels of Elul: A Letter to Myself XII, a collection of essays published by singer/songwriter and music producer, Craig Taubman. Her essay, titled "Dayeinu" focused on the question of "What If?" and explored an answer to the question of "What If you would have been" born or raised in different circumstances.
Stein also contributed an essay to Kaye Blegvad's "The Pink Book: An Illustrated Celebration of the Color, from Bubblegum to Battleships" discussing her relationship with the color pink, the Hasidic community and the color, and her feelings about stereotypical femininity..
Activism
After coming out, Stein started an online support group to help trans people who come from Orthodox backgrounds. Stein also said that Facebook and online support communities have been her lifeline while leaving her community, which made her realize the positive power of online communities.In December 2015 Stein founded a support group for trans people from Orthodox backgrounds. The group's first meeting had 12 people attending, most of them fellow Hassids struggling with their gender identity. Stein's avid blogging also gained her a big following in the Jewish community, and she has become a role model for former ultra-Orthodox Jews – both LGBTQ and not.
Since coming out, Stein has also done several modeling projects depicting her life and transition, which have been published by numerous sites. She told Refinery29 that "I actually liked , It did help me feel more comfortable," and that she does these projects to encourage others on their journey. In 2018 she also did several photo shoots and modeling projects with major fashion magazines such as Vogue and InStyle.
In addition to transgender activism, Stein has also been active in several projects to help those going Off the derech and leaving the Ultra-Orthodox community. She has been working with Footsteps, and its Canadian sister organization, Forward, for which she traveled to Montreal in 2016 to help jump start. In addition, she has also done some lay advocacy work with YAFFED working towards a better education in the Hasidic schools, for which she has also engaged in political work.
In 2018 Stein co-founded her own feminist/womanist multifaith and inclusive celebration of women and nonbinary people of all faith traditions called Sacred Space, with former Mormon feminist and founder of Ordain Women, human rights lawyer Kate Kelly, and Yale Divinity School professor and Baptist preacher Eboni Marshall-Turman.
During the 2020 Democratic Party presidential primaries, Stein served as a national Surrogate for the Bernie Sanders campaign.
Public speaking
Stein's first public appearance was in a promotional video for Footsteps 10th anniversary gala in 2013, where she was interviewed about her experience leaving the Ultra-Orthodox Jewish community. Around the same time, she also did interviews with The Wall Street Journal and the Haaretz about her experience leaving the community and fighting for custody. She also started giving public speeches on these topics.In addition to public speaking, she also teaches classes on Gender within Judaism, as well as bringing attention to trans people from Orthodox communities. As of November 2016, she has had speeches at several universities. She has also done longer speaking tours to several communities in Montreal; the San Francisco Bay Area; and the New York metropolitan area.
Starting in 2016 Stein has also become a rising star in demand for speaking engagements and conferences, such as the Limmud franchise, where at the 2017 Limmud NY conference, she spoke more times than any other presenter. At the same time she has also spoken internationally at conferences such as the American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee's annual Junction Conference in Berlin, and the Miles Nadal JCC's Tikkun in Toronto.
A big part of Stein's events have been with Hillel International affiliates all over the world. According to a 2017 report by Hillel "Stein has visited more than 100 campuses, sharing her story with thousands of students in hopes of teaching them the importance of inclusivity and that “Judaism and queerness are not a contradiction.” Her events drew hundreds of students, where she talks about her life, Transgender in Judaism, Intersectionality, policy and politics as it relates to the LGBTQ community, and consulting on how to be more inclusive.
Stein is today a Globally recognized author, activist, and speaker. As of July 2020, she has given over 400 speeches at venues worldwide.
Women's March leadership
In early 2019 Stein joined the Women's March leadership, as a member of the 2019 Steering Committee. Despite some controversy surrounding the March and its leadership, Stein said that “I’m convinced that working with Women’s March people, we can gain so much more by working together even when there might be some parts we feel uncomfortable with,” and "expressed solidarity with other Jewish women who are supporting the march on grounds that it has emerged as an important and growing coalition of marginalized groups including Jews, African Americans, Hispanics, and LGBT people."During the rally following the march, Stein also spoke on stage alongside Reverend Jacqui Lewis, senior minister of Middle Collegiate Church, and Muslim activist Remaz Abdelgader, leading the spiritual invocation opening the rally. During her speech, which she started with the traditional greeting of "Shabbat Shalom," she related the march to the Exodus, leading the audience in chants denouncing different forms of prejudice and oppression with a chant of "Let It Go." She also called for unity saying that "A lot of people out there, a lot of people in the media are trying to divide us. What brings us together is not the fact that we are all the same. What brings us together is our differences."
In 2020 Stein was a featured speaker at the Women's March NYC, in Foley Square.
Honors and awards
- The Jewish Week 36 Under 36. In 2016 she was named by The Jewish Week as one of the "36 Under 36" young Jews who changed the world, she is the first Trans person ever to get this award.
- Footsteps Leadership Award. At the 2016 Footsteps Celebrates She received a leadership award for "Her outstanding leadership in advancing Footsteps stories in literature and Voice".
- New York Magazine 50 Reasons to Love New York. In 2015, the New York Magazine counted her story as one of the 50 reasons to love New York, saying that New Yorkers are overly accepting of trans people.
- 9 Jewish LGBTQ Activists You Should Know. In June 2016 she was named by The Times of Israel and the Jewish Telegraphic Agency as one of the nine "most influential Jews who have helped make LGBTQ issues visible and are still working to enact change."
- Faith Leaders Leading the Fight for LGBTQ Equality. In October 2017, for LGBT History Month, she was named by the Human Rights Campaign, as one of 9 "faith leaders who are also leading the fight for LGBTQ equality."
- CAFE 100. In April 2018, Stein was named by former US Attorney Preet Bharara, as part of the inaugural "CAFE 100 - extraordinary change-makers who are taking action to address some of the most pressing problems in America and around the world."
- LGBTQ Pride Award. During Pride month in June 2018, Stein was honored by Brooklyn Borough President Eric Adams as part of "a special group of LGBTQ New Yorkers," honoring her work within the LGBTQ, and especially formerly Hasidic LGBTQ community.
- 14 Jews Who Changed Queer History Forever. In June 2019 Stein was named by Alma as one of 14 "Jews who have changed queer history forever." Alongside Jazz Jennings, Rabbi Sandra Lawson, Leslie Feinberg, Magnus Hirschfeld, and others.
- 9 LGBTQ Faith Leaders to Watch in 2019. In September 2019, Stein was named by the Center for American Progress as one of 9 LGBTQ faith leaders, whose "leadership in the current moment makes them critical faith leaders to watch in 2019 and beyond." According to a press release by CAP, "these extraordinary leaders have proposed powerful visions to reform the criminal justice system, advance climate justice, dismantle systemic racism, and more."
- Forward 50. In December 2019, Stein was named by The Forward as one of the 50 American Jews "Who Influenced, Intrigued And Inspired Us This Year." In it Stein also described her commitment to lightning Shabbat candles.
- 10 Women You Need to Know This Women's History Month. In March 2020, for Women's History Month Stein was named by Moment Magazine as one of 10 "powerful and inspiring women who work hard to create change and make an impact." Alongside Martha Nussbaum, Roberta Kaplan, Alice Shalvi, and Dr. Ruth.
- The World’s Top 50 Thinkers. in July 2020, Stein was named by the Prospect Magazine as one of "The World's top 50 Thinkers in the COVID-19 Age." The list, which according to Forbes "is a much-anticipated exercise by the influential British magazine," called Stein a "renegade New York political science college student, and finally 27-year-old globally recognised author and advocate."
Filmography
In addition to a long list of interviews with major national and international news networks, Stein has also been featured in several TV segments in the United States, Canada, Israel, Bulgaria, and more - in English, French, Hebrew, Bulgarian, Russian, Spanish, and Yiddish.| Year | Title | Role | |
| 2014 | Huffington Post Live | TV Series; Episode: "Why Orthodox Jews Struggle to Leave Community" with Shulem Deen | - |
| 2015 | Huffington Post Live | TV Series; Episode: "Why This Trans Woman Left Hasidism To Embrace Her Gender Identity" | - |
| 2015 | Chasing News | Fox TV Series; Episode: "Free To Be Me" | - |
| 2016/2018 | Great Big Story | A CNN Web Series; Episode: "Transitioning to Freedom" - in 2018 the episode was aired again by "Great Big Story Nordics" with Swedish subtitles; Episode: "Transsexuell med ultraortodox bakgrund" | - |
| 2016 | Dark Net | Showtime Television documentary series, Episode 8, "Revolt" | - |
| 2016 | Daily Vice - Canada | Canadian TV Series; Episode: "Les défis d'une activiste trans reniée par sa communauté juive hassidique" In French and in English | - |
| 2017 | NowThis Original | TV Series; Episode: "How This Hasidic Rabbi Became A Trans Woman" - Got 2.6 million views on Facebook alone. | - |
| 2017 | Shishi With Ayala Hasson | Israeli TV Series on Channel 10; Episode: "הכל אודות אבי: מסעו המופלא של האברך החרדי שהפך לאישה", In Hebrew | - |
| 2017 | The Theme of NOVA | Bulgarian TV Show; Episode: "Темата на NOVA: Свещеникът, който се моли да бъде жена" - this was Stein's first TV appearance in Eastern Europe, and Bulgaria's first transgender story on TV, in Bulgarian. | - |
| 2017 | PopSugar | Social Media series; Episode: "This Transgender Trailblazer Left the Hasidic Community to Live Her Truth as a Woman" - it got over 7 million views on Facebook alone, the most of any of her videos | - |
| 2017 | Spanish TV series; Episode: "Abby Stein cortó toda la relación con su familia cuando les contó que era transgénero" - Stein was not interviewed for this episode, in Spanish. | - | |
| 2017 | Time Code - RTVi | International Russian-speaking TV series; Episode: "«Тайм-Код» с Владимиром Ленским. 16 июня" - Filmed at Columbia University, in Russian. | - |
| 2017 | FOX 5 News At 5 | NYC TV news series; Episode: "Transgender woman's journey from Hasidim to a new life". | - |
| 2017 | A Plus: A Grain of Saul | Weekly Facebook based show; Episode: "To mark Transgender Day of Remembrance". | - |
| 2017 | The Rundown | TV show on the International Israeli channel i24NEWS; Episode: "Bridging Ultra-Orthodox and LGBT communities" in two parts, in English | - |
| 2018 | Todo Noticias | Argentinian TV show; Episode: "Cómo un rabino ultraortodoxo se convirtió en mujer," and additional segment "Abby, el rabino ortodoxo que se convirtió en mujer" in Spanish | - |
| 2018 | CAFE 100 | Web Series; Episode: "Episode 2: Abby Stein" | - |
| 2018 | Huffpost Perspectives | TV Series; Episode: S1:E11 "This Trans Woman Left Her Hasidic Community To Fully Embrace Her True Self" | - |
| 2018 | TRENDING | TV Show hosted by Emily Frances; Episode: "From Ultra-Orthodox Rabbi to Transgender Woman" | - |
| 2018 | Stern | German Magazine based Series as part of JWD by Joko Winterscheidt; Episode: "Abby Stein musste eine Welt aufgeben, in der sie Rabbiner sein sollte – um eine Frau zu sein," In German | - |
| 2019 | 112BK | Brooklyn based BRIC TV weekly show; Episode: "A Hasidic Rabbi's Transition" | - |
| 2019 | Queer Kid Stuff | Web series educating kids on LGBTQ+ and social justice topics; Season 4, Episode 2: "Religion with Abby Chava Stein!" | - |
| 2019 | Studio 10 | Australian morning talk show on Network Ten; Episode: "Abby Stein: From Orthodox Rabbi To Transgender Woman" | - |
| 2019 | Today Show | American morning talk show on NBC; Season 67, Episode: "Transgender Woman Chronicles Her Journey from Rabbi to Her True Self" | - |
| 2020 | Magellán | Hungarian Educational and Scientific show on Super TV2; Episode: "Rabbi volt, de nőként él tovább: Exkluzív interjú Abby Steinnel", in Hungarian | - |
| 2020 | Soon By You | A credited and scripted cameo as a Yoga Instructor; Soon By You is a "frum and funky “Friends”-esque sitcom," set in the Modern Orthodox community of New York City's Upper West Side. This S2:E2 episode was focused on the Orthodox LGBTQ community. | - |
| 2020 | Inside Edition | American TV News magazine on CBS; Season 32, Episode: "Abby Stein Is the First from New York’s Hasidic Community to Come Out as Trans" | - |
Personal life
In 2010 Stein married a woman, Fraidy Horowitz, with whom she also had her son, Duvid. The marriage was an arranged marriage by a matchmaker, and the couple only met for 15 minutes prior to the engagement. As Stein left the community, she divorced her wife. In an interview with The Wall Street Journal right after her divorce she said that "They had a good relationship," and that at the time of the divorce she was able to "obtain a 'normal agreement,' including weekly visits, joint custody, split holidays, joint decision-making on major life events and every second weekend with her son."Stein is currently in a relationship with Musician and Rabbinical Student, Dr. Brielle Rassler, PsyD.