Dede Wilsey Diane Buchanan "Dede" Wilsey is a San Francisco socialite , Republican donor and philanthropist , and the widow of San Francisco businessman Al Wilsey. She is the chairman emeritus of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco .Early life and background Wilsey was born Diane Dow Buchanan. Her father, Wiley T. Buchanan, Jr., was the U.S. ambassador to Luxembourg and Austria , as well as the White House Chief of Protocol under Dwight Eisenhower . Her privileged childhood featured summers at the family estate Beaulieu House in Newport, Rhode Island , and in the south of France . When she made her social debut in 1961, as a Connecticut College student, Town & Country Magazine featured her on its cover.Personal life She married shipping magnate and art collector John Traina in 1965, and had two sons, Todd and Trevor Traina . Her father was opposed to his daughter's marriage. In 1980, she divorced Traina. In 1980, she married dairy millionaire Al Wilsey, who had recently divorced his third wife, Patricia Montandon . She and Wilsey were fixtures on the social axes of San Francisco and Napa Valley , where they maintained a country house . Al Wilsey died in 2002 at age 82. She remains a prominent figure in the artistic and cultural spheres of San Francisco. In 2005, she raised $190 million to rebuild the earthquake-damaged De Young Museum in Golden Gate Park , one of the largest collective gifts ever made to an American museum. She has raised millions for local causes like the renovation of Grace Cathedral , as well as the establishment of numerous trusts for organizations such as the San Francisco Ballet and the San Francisco Opera .Controversy Wilsey is featured prominently in her stepson Sean Wilsey's memoir Oh the Glory of it All , in which the author described her as his "evil stepmother", and contended that she married Al Wilsey because of his wealth. In March 2013 , Wilsey was accused of creating turmoil among the staff at the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco, following the death of its longtime director, John Buchanan . She was accused of allegedly using her affluence and influence as board president to fire many long-term curators, using museum personnel to tend to her personal collection, and forcing a show of her son's photos. In July 2016 , it was reported that Wilsey was stepping down from her position as lifetime board president "after the museums paid a $2 million settlement to a former high-ranking executive who said Wilsey had her ousted for revealing alleged misspending of museum money." However, as of May 2019 she was as President and Chair of the museums' governing boards.
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