P'tang, Yang, Kipperbang


P'tang, Yang, Kipperbang, also released as Kipperbang, is a British television film first shown on Channel 4 on its second night, 3 November 1982.
Written by Jack Rosenthal as part of the 1st Love series, it is a simple coming-of-age film set in a grammar school in the outer London suburbs of the late forties. The film was directed by Michael Apted, known for the UK TV documentary series 7 Up as well as movies such as Gorillas in the Mist and . It is the story of Alan Duckworth, a young cricket-obsessed boy, and his first kiss with Ann Lawton. Alan's thoughts are voiced by real life BBC Radio cricket commentator John Arlott in the style of a match commentary. The title phrase comes from a password used by members of Alan's gang. The film has a reputation as a minor cult classic, and still plays occasionally at the UK's BFI National Film Theatre.

Plot

Alan Duckworth is a socially awkward fourteen-year-old who is obsessed with cricket and Ann Lawton, a girl in his class. Alan daydreams throughout his day, showing up late for school and making little academic progress. He becomes friends with the groundsman Tommy, whom he sees as some sort of 'war hero'. Alan often follows Tommy around, telling him how Tommy helped to win the war, while making predictions about what the post-war world will be like. Among other things, Alan predicts that there will be no more wars, everyone will speak Esperanto and everyone, regardless of race or creed, will have a Teasmade.
Miss Land, meanwhile, is worried she is pregnant with Tommy's baby, something that would result in her having to resign from her job as an English teacher. Tommy, however, is arrested and it is revealed that he deserted the war three weeks into his service, rather than fighting at Dunkirk, El Alamein, the Battle of the Bulge and in Burma, as he claimed.
While his friends are all interested in sex, which Alan refers to as 'the other thing', he is purely focused on kissing Ann Lawton. Ann, however, is not well regarded by Alan's friends, since she is very strait-laced. When Miss Land casts them together in the school play, Alan and Ann have to kiss.

Filming

Filming took place at Wimbledon Chase Primary School and in the surrounding area.

Box office

Goldcrest Films invested £378,000 in the film and received £749,000 earning them a profit of £371,000.